crazy faith

Trust God from the bottom of your heart;
    don’t try to figure out everything on your own.

Listen for God’s voice in everything you do, everywhere you go;

    he’s the one who will keep you on track.

Don’t assume that you know it all.

    Run to God! Run from evil!

Your body will glow with health,

    your very bones will vibrate with life!

Honor God with everything you own;

    give him the first and the best.

Your barns will burst,

    your wine vats will brim over.

But don’t, dear friend, resent God’s discipline;

    don’t sulk under his loving correction.

It’s the child he loves that God corrects;

    a father’s delight is behind all this.

        Proverbs 3:2-12 The Message 

Those words. They speak life. They are the breath of God on a page. They are truth. 

And they seep out of my husband to overflowing. I have watched those words transform my man for the past 12 years. Proverbs 3:5-6 is Jeff’s favorite verse. He smiles every time someone speaks of it or when it is read. 

Today is his birthday. Happiest of days my love!  Happy Happy birthday to you! 

I wanted to somehow express our genuine love for him through writing. I desired to tell him of our love and to let him know that we (me and our 4 little Paul’s) are on his team and are cheering him on… Especially on this very special day.  The day Jesus decided to give him life on this Earth. 

However, as a writer, you can’t just make words flow.  It’s not easy to just say “I’m gonna write” and you simply do it. At least that’s not the case for me. Anytime I feel the nudge from the Lord to put words on a page, I always pray they are Spirit filled and words the Lord would have me express. And today… I really, really wanted to write to my husband and tell him Happy Birthday. Kind of like my own, personal, birthday card to him… but nothing “Hallmarky” would spring forth in my writings… And then… I prayed… I asked the Lord to give me words to speak into my husband to express our love and gratitude towards him on this day of his birth. 

Jesus nudged me to open up scripture and read Jeff’s favorite verse… And so I did. 

I decided to read the passage from The Message (above) and was blown away because it beautifully displays the splendor of God in my husband. 

Jeff… You possess more faith and trust in the Lord than anyone I have ever met. 

You are quiet, gentle, meek and humble… Not loud and boisterous, so if one didn’t know you well, they may never know the qualities you possess in their fullness. 

You desire more than anything on this Earth, to love us well and to provide for our every need. God has called you to lead our family in such a way that may look strange to so many people.  A family of 6 living in a camper, traveling the country in order for you to provide sounds like such a crazy thing to do… But you prayed… You searched scriptures… You took a leap of faith and sent us on this incredible journey.  Here we are. And life is good! 

After each “deployment” or contract you accept… We never really know where we are going next until the door opens. For me, that is so scary.  I am always anxious and nervous when one assignment comes to an end because I never know when and where we will be headed next. To be honest, I always have plan A, B, C, D and sometimes E stowed away ready to pull out of my back pocket just in case God “doesn’t come through this time.” Although I know He will… He always has… And He always does.  He has called us to this life and I know in my head he will provide and lead the way… But in my heart I get nervous about the waiting for the next job part…

But you… 

You have it all under control. You trust God and have more faith than I could ever imagine.  I come with my tiny piece of “mustard seed faith” (thankfully, scripture says that’s all that is required)… But you… 

You have full on faith. Faith that doesn’t sit and wait for the mountain to move because you are already on the other side of the mountain with Jesus watching what He just did! Your faith is contagious! Your faith in Jesus is lovely. 

I pray to one day catch up with you and your amazing faith… But in the meantime… I will hold my little piece of mustard seed faith… While holding as tight as I can to your hand… Because I trust that you are holding on to the Lord as you lead this family well, on this crazy, traveling  journey of faith the Lord has us on! 

Happiest of Birthdays my love! 



4 thoughts on “crazy faith

  1. Jeff

    Thank you so much for those kind words, 😭 you are the best wife a man can ask for. I am so blessed to have you and the family that God has given us. I Love U!!


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